The Flatcap volumes

We all know a Flatcap. He’s the man holding court in the tap room, espousing his opinions and his wealth of worldly knowledge on every subject under the sun. In exchange for a half of bitter and two pork pies, Flatcap will give the benefit of his wisdom on all those nagging questions.


Flatcap on Sex

FCSEXAre there radiation risks to using glow-in-the-dark condoms? Is custard cheaper than a flavoured condom? Does your ideal woman own a Mark II Ford Cortina? Do you spend Valentine’s night vertical or horizontal? Can you find time for your matchstick model of St Paul’s Cathedral?

The answers to these questions and many more are contained in Flatcap’s Guide to Sex. The doyen of the Dog & Duck, the man who knows everything, patiently guides you through the ecstasy and enigma of the erotic, the charm and conundrum of the carnal, the ins and outs of in and out.

LOL humour from the man who is certain he knows it all.

“This has to be one of the funniest books on the subject – ever.” Carol Hunter

“Another funny read, and oh so very true.” Mrs B Steadman

“A fun read for Chubby Brown fans. Beware who you give one to, the book that is” David Medlvcott

Flatcap on Sex is available for the Kindle from Amazon UK and Amazon Worldwide.

Flatcap – Grumpy Old Blogger

FCGOBFrom politicians to pies, holiday hell holes to health, travel to tautology, Flatcap must have his say.

A LOL, volume of sledgehammer snippets from the man who has an opinion on everything.



“A hilarious collection of opinion pieces from everyone’s favourite grumpy old bugger, David Robinson.” Nettie Thomson

“I found it so funny and being old myself could understand why he finds things that way. Laugh a minute for me.” Peter

“Very funny, read this on holiday. Good light reading, had me giving out loud in places.” Angela Barker

Flatcap – Grumpy Old Blogger is available for the Kindle from Amazon UK and Amazon Worldwide


Flatcap’s Guide to UK Holidays

FCUKHIn Flatcap’s ideal world, holidays would be spent at home. But it is not an ideal world. There is Mrs Flatcap to consider, and Mrs Flatcap likes to travel. Flatcap has been married for forty years. He therefore knows a lot about marriage, wives and by default, holidays. Here he gives you the benefit of his worldly experience on how to successfully sabotage vacations in the hope that Her Indoors will never want to go anywhere ever again. From the Declaration of Holiday to the return journey, he spells out opportunities aplenty for subverting a week’s vacation.

Another LOL guide from the barfly of the Jolly Carter.

“Just too true. especially the description of the period from booking to going. cried laughing. Can’t wait to read his next book.” Andrew Baker

“Great insight into the grumpire world. I never stopped laughing from the first page to the last. Absolutely great read.” M Hardy

“This book is a great read and a keenly observed snapshot of the great institution that is the British Bloke.” Keith Finney

Flatcap’s Guide to UK Holidays is available for the Kindle from Amazon UK and Amazon Worldwide